Trouble in Paradise

Paradise: an ancient Persian word meaning garden.

The other day as I examined the plants in my personal paradise, I found an interloper—a “giant” grasshopper. It was exactly the color of the hibiscus leaves. I’m not one to pick up bugs, uh uh, so I didn’t know how to get rid of it (and I prefer not to kill them if there’s another way). If I shook the bush, the grasshopper would just jump to another leaf. As I prayed for a solution, I looked around and saw a handy small plastic pot and my garden gloves. With my gloves on (!), I scooped the pest into the pot and cast it from my garden. It flew to a tree across the easement. Sure it could come back but I kept it from eating more for awhile at least. Then I saw the huge hole in a leaf of my beautiful red-striped Tropicana cannas—the grasshopper’s calling card.

Today, I found more holes. It was back. I checked each plant as I watered and then in the last spot, I caught it green-pincered on a coleus leaf (it must like colorful food like I do). My method didn’t work as well this time since I had a little less elbow room to throw it and the grasshopper landed in a hanging basket. By the time I spotted its new hiding place and turned to get the pot, it was gone. I searched and rustled the other plants without finding it so maybe it flew away. Good riddance!

Okay, so maybe I’d find it a fascinating part of God’s creation if it wasn’t devastating my plants. It’s not like there isn’t plenty other greenery out there in the semi-wild. They are kosher but I won’t go there…except to ask those who insist that the Biblical dietary laws are the only acceptable diet, “Mmm…have you eaten the grasshoppers on that diet?” And yes, I know that they are a delicacy in some cultures and in others they are “all they have” but unless it’s necessary, thank you but no thank you.